The Rebel

Have you guys heard of the new movie coming out called "The Runaways?" This is a movie about the all girl band of the late seventies. They were four teenage girls rocking just as hard as the boys. They did their own thing and they were a huge hit. Because of my tender age and conservative upbringing I didn't know about the band until a couple years ago. Their lead singer, Cherie Curry is now an accomplished chainsaw artist. I came across her site and we exchanges several emails, just one chainsaw carving girl to another. Now, I found out she is this big celebrity. Pretty cool, huh? Anyhow, thinking about what those girls did and what Cherie does now got me thinking...

Am I truly a rebel, or am I just playing at it? I like to think of myself as a free spirit, one who goes against the grain and does what people say can't be done. But, although I have taken my own road on many issues, there is still a very strong part of my identity tied to the social conformity that I was raised with. I was brought up to be a good person, fit in and follow all the rules.
I try so hard to just be myself and act on how I feel, but it's a conscious effort to do so. It seems I have these built in filters always monitoring how I act and what I say. They say, "What are other people going to think of you?" Everyday I have to constantly remind myself to ignore the filters and just be who I am. Who gives a damn what other people think! I will never accomplish anything great if I am too busy just trying to keep everyone happy!
My goal is to simply let out the rebel that has been repressed for so long. That doesn't mean I'm going to go out and get ten facial piercings and twenty-five tattoos, although I will if I feel like it. I just want to let my spirit be free to feel, say and create whatever it comes up with. The filters are coming off, god save the queen.